What exactly is it like to turn 50?
It’s a bummer.
But wait! Before you (understandably) assume that this post will be all woe is me please bare with me a read a bit further.
For me, no birthday of my own has ever been cause for rejoicing. I can’t explain it, that’s just the way it is. And though many friends have looked at me with me confusion about my attitude toward my own birthday and have told me things like “this is your day”, “this is the day you were born”, “aren’t you happy to be alive?”, it has all been for naught.
But this year, as I cross yet another arbitrary birthday milestone, I can feel my attitude changing. There are two reasons: Avalon and Amelia, my baby daughters. When I think about their birthday I cannot think of a happier day. It’s the day they were welcomed to the world, the day the world changed ever so slightly for most and in the greatest and best possible way for me and my wife, Catherine, the day they will forever call their birthday. And though I will most likely never be one to celebrate my own birthday with much of a celebration I will always want to celebrate theirs in grand style.
So, yes, turning 50 has me a bit down. But not as much as past birthdays and not as much as every birthday of mine to come, because I am starting to look at my own birthday through the lens of how I see Avalon and Amelia’s, and this is no mere rose tinted lens but rather one that lets me see the rose that actually, truly tints the world.
Here's my song for my babies! (Yes, I've posted it before but today's my birthday!)